New Year Resolves

I have been skimming through friends and strangers blogs reading all about their plans and reasons for shedding pounds, reclaiming organization, daring to be different and letting go of control. I agree with all of them and yet find myself afraid of embracing them. I see myself now 15 lbs heavier than in September when we adopted Shiloh, mountains of stuff, too many unfinished projects, and a huge amount of self pity that is getting me no where. So what is my New Years Resolutions??? I want to resolve somethings. Here is my list of things that in 2009 I am praying with the good Lord's help will be resolved.

1) Starting on January 6th I am going on a liver cleanse that will last 12 days. This is to get rid of toxins that are stirring the pot of terrible symptoms of endometriosis. The last two weeks of painful days and too much prescription medication have told me that I am loosing the battle with comfort foods and loosing the healing that I have been given by God through poisoning my body. Lord give me the grace to push past food, see my need for You, and embrace all that you have for me.

2) After my liver cleanse I am going back on my stricter eating habits. Two days ago I was in so much pain I couldn't take care of Shiloh at all. I hated myself and Satan used it to torments me. I know that when I eat healthier and organic I feel much better and my episodes of pain are much, much fewer. This means that I have to say good bye to sugar and white flour. I am hoping that with the liver cleanse I will have less cravings and through prayer the Lord will help me overcome my addiction to food.

3) De-clutter my home. I need to reclaim the serenity of my home by emptying out my closets and cupboards. There is years of collected stuff that will never be used in my home and I hang on to it in the hopes that I will be creative and use it, or redecorate something to match this or that.... what a waste.

4) This is HUGE... I must finish my Registered Nursing degree. I have sat on the materials and motivation far too long. I have about 6-7 months to go on my degree and I really need to finish. It would allow for so much more free time with my family and a better income with less stress. Please pray for me on this. I have felt real war every time I pick up a book to study. The enemy wants me to stay in my rut and be away from my daughter. He knows that the more time I have at home the more I will pray over her, teach her, and remove his stumbling blocks.

5) Get a real schedule. Shiloh is well on her schedule and she does so good, so why do I waste my time? You would think that if I could schedule her I could schedule myself. Yeah, fat chance. But slowly I am going to try to get myself in order. Time with God, time to keep my house in order, time for my man, and time for me. A lot of time for my little angel of course! (oh and for my blog. I long to be a better blogger :-)

That is my list. Small you think, but each one is a huge step to more wholeness for me and will take me fighting myself tooth and nail to accomplish. If you think about me pray for me and if you see me challenge me by asking how my "List" is going. I need the nudge or the opportunity to praise the Lord in telling how I am overcoming. I have joined a blog group for support through my liver cleanse. It is a diet group, but focusing on why we are addicted to food and how to rely on Jesus to meet our needs. That I need. Tomorrow is a new day and I feel the need for something new.

2008 was such an amazing year for us. Individually we had to overcome some big hurtles. Together we embarked on a life long journey,and as a family we touched the heart of God and have gain revelation on a little of what HE feels towards us. I will blog on that next I think.