This morning as I was crawling out of bed, ( I didn't get off work till after midnight) I realized that everyday brings us a little closer to having our baby. Soon I will be waking up to Baby Cooper's schedule and wondering where the days of sleeping in have gone. Every Wednesday I go to the Prayer Room and engage in a time of contemplative prayer in the Bethany Room. For those unfamiliar with the meaning of this sentence it is just a room set aside at the house of prayer for those who have chronic or fatal illnesses to receive more intense prayer. Due to my Endometriosis and infertility I made it on to the list. So from 8:30am-10:00am two wonderful friends pray over me as we meditate on the Word of God, Jesus. It is amazing, and though I have a hard time sitting still in any context I enjoy my times in the Bethany Room. The Lord has shown Himself more than once in healing me in times of discomfort, pain, and emotional distress. He is always faithful!
This morning we meditated on a classic, Isaiah 53. We focused particularly on v.5 & 11. When I meditate I see pictures, mainly because I am a very visual person. I was thinking through the movie the "Passion of the Christ" as I thanked Jesus for bearing my iniquity. That I was brought near because His flesh was torn. That as I am washed in the blood of Jesus, the accusations against me are dissolved. I stand because He put to death all emnity there was between the Father and me in His flesh. It was a real sober, yet amazing time of thinking on Jesus. V11 talks about the fact that He will see the labor of His soul and be satisfied. In my body, Jesus will see the labor of the cross and be satisfied in my complete healing! It is amazing.
Waiting on our case worker to finish our report is working patience in me. I am resisting that process a little, because I am ready to be done. I started thinking about the scripture in Ephesians 1 where we are "adopted" into the household of God. That means that God understands my plight. WOW... Jesus had to walk out a home study "process" in order to attain to the Fathers desire. He is still waiting for our fullness. I have not one reason to be anxious and angry, because my Father is still waiting for the fullness of our adoption.
Lord give me strength and grace to stand in a humble attitude of waiting. Let me be gracious and gentle as Jesus during Your "home study process".
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